Today is a beautiful warm spring day. You can open up the windows, letting the fresh air in. There is yard work that needs to be done, cars to wash, garages to be cleaned out, or grilling to do. All of which are things dealing with something that I have loved my entire life, being outside.
I am a lake person! I MEAN I AM A LAKE PERSON. I grew up on a lake, my grandparents lived on a lake, and my aunt and uncle had a vacation place on a lake. If there was water, I was in it or around it. Captain Obvious would say I have no doubt this certainly helped lead to my current situation, among other factors…
The lake was always my happy place, my safe place. It is the place that, until recently, centered me. It took all my worries away. It let me work through my problems. I celebrated or just relaxed with family and friends. There are far too many memories to go through in just one day.
These days I have a new challenge facing me. How do I go back and face the very thing that helped put me in this lousy situation? The sunshine. Two words. Should be simple right?? Wrong, IT IS TERRIFYING! So, what do I do now? Hide in the house all day, letting a beautiful day pass me by? Not get things done? Be a victim of my self-imposed prison?
I’ll tell you what guys, it is hard facing your fears. After running my daughter to an appointment, I kept doing chores inside the house. I looked outside and wanted to be out there so desperately. I just kept finding other things to do in order not to accept today’s challenge. My dog kept looking at me while begging me to take her out to bask in the splendor of the afternoon. I know to some it sounds like a very menial task, but, it was Herculean.
The enemy takes EVERY opportunity to get into your head. “You’ll never be able to go chill at the lake again. Or go out and do yard work. Most importantly, you wont be able to feel the sun and wind on your face, listen to all the sounds, join in the fun with everyone else.” It’s hard to not let that get the best of you. I REFUSE to let the enemy win. So you know what I did? You’ll never guess. (drum roll please) Wait for it, I went outside and did some work. Guess what, I didn’t burn up into a million flames, lightning didn’t strike me, and the world kept spinning. Can you imagine, everything was okay? It was better than okay. I could feel the sun and breeze, my dog was a happy camper, and things got done.
There are other scary things to talk about another day. For today, this seemed poignant to me. What is the big deal here you may ask. I had (still have) a fear of something I once used to treasure. It’s so easy to stick with the fear guys, it’s hard to stand and be brave. I urge you, BE BRAVE. Life is too short and bad things happen. Strap into your rollercoaster seat, sit in the front row, put your arms up, and yell at the top of your lungs! Enjoy the ride, it’s the ride of your life. There will be lots of ups and downs, twists and turns, but, they are so worth it. Do what is scary…
Much love,
Jody
This Thing Called Life 